WHAT IS MEDIATION?
Like death and taxes, conflict is one of life’s inevitabilities.
Whether it’s a disagreement with a business partner, a family dispute, or a community issue, most of us are or have recently experience some sort of disagreement, misunderstanding, or strained communication. For most of us, our instinct is to avoid addressing the conflict as long as possible, postponing difficult conversations, putting a band aid on the breach or transition that has not yet been solved. But when conflict is avoided and left to fester, it rarely disappears. Instead, it usually grows larger and deeper than before.
So, what is there to do? When the friendly phone call or kitchen table chat fails, many people assume their only recourse is to dig deep into their bank accounts and hire an attorney. Sometimes, in the worst disagreements, spending tens of thousands of dollars to escalate a conflict in order to force a settlement is the only path. But most of the time there is another way—a less adversarial, more affordable, more humane way: mediation.
What is Mediation
Mediation is a voluntary process where a neutral third person (the mediator) helps the people in conflict or transition find a path of communication that will allow them to reach a mutually agreeable solution.
Unlike court battles in which a judge mandates what will happen or even the high-cost and high pressure back and forth of emailed proposals from one attorney to another, the process mediation empowers the people involved to choose their own outcome. Rather than escalating conflict until one side gives in, mediation offers a path that is collaborative, cost-effective, and, most importantly, centered on the needs of everyone involved.
How Does Mediation Work?
Mediation is a flexible process that can be tailored to fit the unique needs of each situation.
Here’s a step-by-step look at how mediation generally works:
1. Initiation: Both people agree to pursue mediation, and a mediator is selected. The mediator must be neutral, with no personal interest in the outcome, and both people must trust that the mediator will facilitate a fair process.
2. Introduction: The mediator introduces the process, outlining the guidelines and establishing ground rules. The goal is to create a safe and respectful environment where each person can express their views without interruption.
3. Issue Identification: Each person has an opportunity to share their perspective on the conflict or transition, helping the mediator identify the key issues that need to be addressed.
4. Facilitating Discussion: The mediator will guide a structured conversation to lead the people towards resolution. In some mediations, everyone stays in one room. In others, each person waits in their own separate space, while the mediator moves back and forth.
5. Negotiation: As bridges between the points of view emerge, the mediator helps the parties negotiate a resolution that works for everyone. Mediation makes room for people to develop creative solutions to their conflict or transition—solutions that judge might not order.
6. Agreement: If both parties agree to a solution, the mediator helps draft an agreement. Depending on the preferences of the participants and the requirements of the situation, the agreement can either be legally binding or simply a mutual understanding.
Whether an agreement is reached or not, mediation is confidential, meaning that nothing said during the process can be used in court. This allows parties to speak openly and honestly, without fear of repercussion.
Is Mediation Right for You?
Mediation is particularly effective when both parties are willing to come to the table and negotiate in good faith. If you’re involved in a conflict or transition and you’re looking for a faster, more cost-effective, and amicable way to resolve it, mediation might be the right path for you.
At Thresholds Mediation, we believe in the power of communication and the importance of finding solutions that honor the needs and values of everyone involved. If you’re ready to explore mediation as an option, we’re here to help guide you every step of the way.